Sarah Nyhan

Taking Up Space

Writing

  • Prologue

    Does God love me?

    Is the Bible trustworthy?

    What is righteousness and salvation?

  • John 2

    Fri 6/21/2019 8:16 PM

    Walk in love

    Back to foundations. Back to basics. Keep it simple. Thought I was doing right. Had it totally wrong. I remain in judgement. Water the tree. Don’t only pick the fruit. Think of the good things in people and be thankful for them. And promote and encourage / water those things. And how about in me? How I treat myself? Tremendous persecution. I was not born to be on an island. A safe island. Water the tree. Water the tree. I am connected to everyone else and they are connected to me. I have to leave people alone and let Holy Spirit unveil their eyes. Please help me mind, Lord. I get scared. Please help me. To love is more important than anything. My priorities have not been correct. Please help me Lord. Please help me so much. Love as Jesus loved me. I will he challenged. Perfect people do not exist. Perfect churches do not exist. False teachers steal peace? Please protect my mind, Lord. And my heart. What other people are doing is none of my business? Especially if it doesn’t affect me? Love as we have been loved. Self-care and self-love is my responsibility. These people talking are distracting me for my mind. You meant it for evil but God meant it for good. Continue in Christ. I cannot come here. I have the freedom to not come here. I can love people outside of here. Watch and don’t lose what I have worked for. We don’t work for salvation. People who boast are feeling justified by their works. That’s why the Holy Spirit isn’t at CCSA so much. I don’t think this is where I need to be. Please help me God. Are You going to defend me with these people, Lord? Same thing is happening here with “Judi-izers” coming in and telling people that they have to do extra stuff. Will you defend me on a national, international level? For Will? I feel like he is speaking his own prophecy. Will it close soon? They aren’t receiving me. I am throwing my pearls before swine. Please help me walk away Lord. If I need to. They have left their first love. Jesus. They should repent. I have warned them. I kinda hope and pray this church closes. What will happen when the church comes crashing down. It is Ron’s work. But it should be Jesus’ work. What in the hell is he talking about? Used by God? Never once included me or accepted me or reached out to me. Please help me so much. Just preach Jesus and explain Jesus. Oh man I feel bad for them. I really pray the church closes just so they will experience real freedom and not lead people astray. I am not welcome here. Am I just here to be a mirror for them before things go down. To be in truth and tell the truth is to be loving. To tolerate false doctrine is to be unloving. Please help me, Lord.

  • Perfectly Imperfect

    Just finished skimming over this article our professor suggested we read for the Art Appreciation class I have to take for my Bachelor’s degree. As a recovering perfectionist, I found some of it interesting. Rather lengthy and touches many topics, but just sending in case you need some 6am reading material. 😊 Kinda cool story in it:

  • Already Included #17 – John MacMurray: March 2nd

    Today I attended the event in Belton, Texas where John MacMurray was speaking with a focus on the material in his latest book, A Spiritual Evolution. As God always does, I went expecting certain outcomes and was completely surprised by what God seemed to have in store for me personally. I also met some new friends and enjoyed talking with so many people. Community is always my favorite part of these events.

    But how RICH we were to have John travel all the way from Oregon to speak with us for over four hours! A spiritual buffet if you will. And we were stuffed with so much goodness. Here are my highlights from thirteen pages of notes taken in my new journal gifted to me by the beautiful Clarice:

    • People are not going to look for other answers or be open to new information that challenges their current paradigm until life brings them to a point where they consider that their current way of thinking may be incorrect.
    • Relationship takes a long time. Life is about relationship. Information is not the end goal.
    • Love is not something God does. Love is who God is. The deepest, truest thing about God is NOT that He is a narcissist.
    • God is always better than whatever metaphors we try our best to use to explain Him.
    • The way I used to think said God’s highest aim was to create us for His glory. It is different and totally beautiful if rather God creates to share the relationship experienced by The Trinity.
    • In The Trinity there is now humanity through Jesus.
    • We cannot control others. We can only influence others. And we influence through love.
    • It is a holy privilege to have children.
    • We can live out of already being embraced by God versus living to be embraced by God.
    • God is interested in destroying the sin that comes between Lover and beloved. This is versus loving rules over relationship and being focused on punishing sin.
    • In this way we also should think of sin in relational terms versus moral or legal terms.
    • No one wants to get into our mess to clean it up. God not only gets into our mess, but He jumps in to heal us – not just clean us.
    • Jesus comes to give us His knowledge of OUR Father. Our problem is we don’t know our Father.
    • Eternal life is also relational.
    • God is completely invested IN and committed to us. To you. To me.
    • The truth of my being is different than the way of my being. And obviously we aim for the way to eventually match the truth. This is at least a lifelong process. Without a pass/fail final exam.
    • Reconciliation is a different conversation than forgiveness. You can’t have reconciliation without trust.
    • Beauty shortcircuits intellect. Beauty gets behind our watchful dragons.
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  • Wabi Sabi

    “Nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect.” – author unknown

    Find the beauty. And accept.

    “Even when petals have flaws, all you see is a beautiful flower.” – Adrianne Elizabeth

    “Broken pots and plates as thrown by many of us as waste, are fixed with gold, in Japan and happily embraced.” – Lalita Saini

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  • Les Miserables

    How have I lived this long and never watched the movie Les Miserables before?! I only watched it tonight while I was working because I read about it in John MacMurray’s book “A Spiritual Evolution”. It couldn’t be a better movie for the subject matter John is addressing at least through chapter 8. Wow! Quote from the final scene of the movie:

    “I needed to think about what you deserve… You don’t understand the importance of the law… It’s a pity the rules don’t allow me to be merciful. I’ve tried to live my life without breaking a single rule.”

    If you’re at all interested, I recommend John’s book and he will be in Texas this weekend to talk about his own story. I have details if you’re interested.

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  • Uzzah

    I’ve been thinking about the Uzzah story. I feel like it is not a story to stand on it’s own. I feel like it’s like the middle point of a chiasm of sorts. Like Uzzah is a picture of something else bigger that is going on. And since Uzzah means strength, I am wondering if the message for us is something about our strength being unnecessary? In what, I’m not sure. I try to research this from the Jewish perspective but I haven’t found much yet. I think I’m just not knowing yet how best to search for it. But I feel like there is some connection to God being enough and our help is unnecessary? Just ideas. But since I’m not having much “luck” yet on the little bit of time I’ve spent on this, I thought I’d just bounce it off of you and see if any of that resonated? And your thoughts? There’s all this talk about the ark carrying itself and the priests when it was on the poles, but I can’t tell yet if that is myth or accepted as literal truth.