Sarah Nyhan

I was told that cursing was a sin. And they defined cursing as saying words like: damn, shit, fuck, bitch, etc.

I used to believe that definition of cursing. Because it was all I ever heard and knew.

But now I no longer refer to those words as curse words or cursing. I no longer believe that saying those words is “sinful”. Most of the time. 

In fact sometimes saying those words is the best use of the English language. At least in terms of how those words are received by many.

I now define sin as thinking differently about things than how Trinity thinks. I no longer see sin as necessarily a moral issue. I see it more as a perception and understanding issue. 

Sin, as I now understand it, can lead to hurtful behaviors, sure. And absolutely. Just look around – that much is undebatable. 

And there is accepted morality especially socially. 

But I now view cursing as more of damning someone to separation from Trinity. Not that I believe in actuality that someone can be separated from Trinity. Their Love knows no end – yes and Amen. 

But what I am referring to is misleading someone into “sinning” by THINKING that they are separate from God. Separate from their Creator. Separate from Holy Spirit, Trinity, their heavenly Father. Etc.

So I now believe that most preachers that I’ve heard curse WAY MORE than I do. Almost all day every day some of them. Just raining, pouring out and down non-stop condemnation. 

As if they have room to judge. As if they are somehow qualified to be the intermediary to determine whether God is upset with someone. 

You don’t have enough of your own work to do? Oh that’s right, you don’t actually work in the real world. All you do is sit on your high horse and make people feel bad. Then collect checks from ’em. 

Try running that shit out here in the streets. Without the insulation of your little clique of followers that you don’t even respect. You’ll get eaten up real bad. You’ll get your pompous ass handed to you and humbled real quick out here with real Life, real problems, and real people. Instead of endless navel-gazing and intellectual masturbation.

I used to think the Bible verse about two different kinds of water coming out the same spring was related to saying words like fuck, damn, shit, bitch, etc.

Now I understand and believe completely different. 

Now I think that verse relates more towards what preachers do. How they blaspheme the character of God. How they twist and have to do mental gymnastics to say out one side of their mouth that God is Love and God is good. But then turn right around sometimes in the same breath and say the complete opposite: that god sends little babies to a never-ending barbeque pit to literally and physically burn and roast alive for the rest of time just because they even had a thought that was a “mistake”.

That’s two diametrically opposed gods. 

The real God says Trinity merciful, gracious, slow to anger, patient, long-suffering. But then these cursing religious folk turn right around and say god also loves rules more than Their Creation. So much so that only the shedding of blood and the burning of literal human flesh will make this maniac monster god happy enough. 

Nothing about that makes sense. Like ocean and fresh water coming out of the same spring.

The real Trinity doesn’t require you to suspend your intellect. The real Trinity didn’t require anyone at all to die ever. For any sacrifice.

It is us who demands punishment. Us who demand blood. Us who demand death.

God said, “Okay, bet.” And Jesus came down to take away any excuse we have to not forgive each other. God said, “Whatever you think someone owes you, Trinity will pay that debt. Name the price.”

Now that’s not a message that sold well when Romans were enslaving folks back then. Or when the oligarchs enslave us today. No getting rich preaching that message. Or winning many friends. I’m living proof. 

But to say that anyone, even the Romans and oligarchs, even the modern-day religious zealots and Pharisees, are not as Loved by God as those whose every other word is shit, damn, fuck, and bitch – now that’s the real travesty. That’s the real sin.

When I hear a leader of my former church community telling people that they are and will be rejected by God because they happen to be living with someone they Love and/or are fucking, that is what I now consider cursing. That’s bullshit to me.

That is majoring in the minors. 

Whether living with that person is beneficial to everyone or not may or may not be an issue. I’m sure there are real benefits to making a commitment to each other before becoming financially entangled. Just to name one consideration. 

But sleeping in the same bed as and fucking another consenting adult has zero, and I will die on this – ZERO – to do with whether Trinity Loves, accepts, and is pleased. Especially when it comes to what happens after our human bodies give out.

That makes sense. That doesn’t require appointing yourself as the morality police to do patrols on people’s personal lives in order to condemn everyone. Instead of dealing with your own unhappiness and jealousy. 

Instead of REALLY getting real with Jesus. You won’t ask the hard questions. Because you don’t really believe this “god” you preach so hard. Why would you? He seems quite the narcissist. Quite the egotistical monster.

No thanks. 

I believe in a better God.

The real God who has not disappointed since I switched. 

I no longer am suicidal at least as it pertains to confusion or dread. Once I was shown and understood The real God, immediately a hardfast peace settled everything in me instantly. And never left me. 

Despite the whole damn world falling apart in the interim. Society and personally. Every thing!!! Except Jesus Loves me – that is the ONLY thing that remains.

And not just me. Every last person. Every last thing. No matter what. No matter who. No matter what they have done. None of it separates you from relationship with Christ. 

Only consequences in how you experience this time and the people you have been given. Including your relationship with yourself.

To say otherwise is to curse. To damn people. At least in how they think. To unnecessarily torture them. 

And God-forbid you tell a child the things you tell adults!!! Children in age specifically. But also applies to the spiritual age of all.

To make everyone twice the sons of hell that you are. Always reading, always studying. But never coming to comprehension.

Women – led by their guilt. Worshipping their own opinions over what God said long ago: if you so need punishment, if you so need whips and chains – fine, but it is FINISHED! For your sakes, for your guilt-ridden conscience only — on a Cross 2,000 years ago!

Or how much MORE millennia of blood will YOU require until YOU will be satisfied!?! Until YOU will unhook Jesus from The Cross and go actually Live your damn, fucking LIFE before your shit ass gets taken out like a bitch!?! 

God standing there on the other side like, “I tried to tell you.” Still with zero condemnation. Only Love. 

THAT is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Even now. When you think of all the time you lost just singing those same damn hymns in the pews ad nauseum. Completely missing the point.

Some of us. Cause I was once there also.

Let me stop. Cause there are little lambs who don’t fall into that category. Who don’t need my tongue-lashing. Most start out fine. With nothing but good intentions.

My screaming and yelling is for the others. Only because I so desperately want them to wake up. And stop hurting themselves and others.

Alas, I am no Jesus. Am no Holy Spirit. 

But my dumb ass is eternal hopeful. So I keep leaving these breadcrumbs as I trudge along. Mourning that I have no one to celebrate with. The ACTUAL good news. At least yet. My healing first. I suppose.

So yes, I will continue on with as much colorful language as fits situations. 

And as frustrated as I am by those who appoint themselves to judge. And reject myself and others – who find what words we can to describe the hells of pain we’ve endured. Even at the hands and mouths of those who will then exclaim they Love God so much. Yet there is no doubt in my mind that even them, even you, are Loved by Trinity just as much as me. Just as much as everyone else. Totally.