I am posting a lot of my writings. They are in no particular order for now. Most of this is very old and from a long time ago.
I had the desire to watch the Monday night study at Calvary Chapel San Antonio. And thankfully it was Paula.
As much as she might not like to teach, I like her teaching best. Even when I don’t agree with what she is saying. It’s like I trust her heart even if I think she is way off base.
But anyway, she was speaking and before I listened I prayed to God to protect my mind. And sure enough, there were several parts where I completely zoned out and wasn’t listening. And then my attention would shoot back and I’d “hear” something. And then zone out again, and come back for another part. Spirit is so cool to protect me like that!
But anyway, she talked about how if we think God is asking us to do something and it doesn’t make sense – just do it. She gave an example about how she missed out one time.
And I was reminded of her words over several few days. It was like God was telling me it was okay to write this.
I don’t know what is going to happen. But if I’m supposed to write this for some reason, then I don’t want to miss out. I don’t want to be standing there with regrets after the fact.
I’ve fought God long enough. Since December 2017. Over five years. I don’t want to fight anymore. I can’t.
I know God loves me. I know God has come through for me in so many big ways so many times before. Ways that I haven’t heard other people experience. And I chalk that up to some of the perks of being an orphan of sorts. That God seems to make up the difference for me in certain places that maybe others don’t look to experience. But I’m looking because I’m hungry. I have no one or nothing.
But anyway, it’s like God led me through the Red Sea and I don’t want to go back to Egypt. I can’t forget what God has done for me.
Yes, I get tired and frustrated. And because of the struggles I had when I was younger, I fear that all this is just dreams. Just me making up stuff that will never happen. I mean can you imagine if I started telling people that the biggest things that I believe God can do?! It’s all nice to get theoretical. People will tolerate that. But for me to take a stand to die on that hill. To live as if. Yeah, that would not go over well.
And maybe God won’t do those biggest things. And then I’ll be left to eat crow yet again. But I’ve already lost so much. So if the world turns against me even more, there honestly isn’t even that much left to lose. So what, I am shunned. Not much difference than it is now.
Music I’m listening to, discovered, or rediscovered.
- Cheshire – All I Wanna
- Daily Bread – Moreland Ave Blues
- Daryl Hall & John Oates – I Can’t Go for That (No Can Do)
- GRiZ – Rock n Roll
- GRiZ with iDA HAWK – Stop Trippin’
- Kygo, Zak Abel ft. Zak Abel – Freedom
- Max Sedgley – Slowly (Original Full Length Version)
- Opiuo – Creamy Taco
- Shin-Ski – FOMALHAUT
- TroyBoi – Fireman
Other content I’ve consumed.
- Computer can run on atoms
- How To Become Great In A Fragile World
- HOW TO GET FANS ON ONLYFANS GUARANTEED‼️ | ONLYFANS TIPS | iDanek Danielle
- Is owning a laundromat worth it with all the repairs?
- PLUS SIZE OnlyFans Update | How much I made
- The Slow Poison of Endless Fantasy
- This is the greatest time to be alive in history
- To Read 10K Books is Not as Good as to Walk 10K Miles
- Understand the Laws of Power I Robert Greene
- You Don’t Need to Be Famous To Make a Living On Social Media
Pirata tacos from Los Arcos in San Antonio, Texas.
