Sarah Nyhan

A continuation of my attempt to finish a book I started in December 2017. Posting chapters in an attempt to organize it all and finish.

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Although I didn’t realize it at the time, you first captured my attention that night.

We were sitting there talking and women kept coming up to you and asking you to adjust them. Each time you looked at them and without skipping a beat, acknowledged them and told them you’d adjust them after you were finished “talking to Sarah”.

I wasn’t used to that. I was used to men ditching me at the first opportunity if a fitter or more “powerful” woman came along. I was ready to play small and let you go, let them take you away. But each time you would address them and then turn around and keep talking to me.

It happened first. Then again. Then preachers’ wives were even coming over to you. We were clearly speaking in deep conversation and they would just interrupt us to ask you to adjust them. And each time you responded the same. That you’d adjust them after you finished talking to me.

I saw the look in even the preachers’ wives eyes. Like it’s all fine to give me a hug at church. And smile. And say, “God bless you.” But the look in their eyes, when you wouldn’t leave me for them, said, “I’m more important than you, Sarah. I look better. Why is he daring to keep talking to you instead of paying attention to me!?” It caught me off-guard, honestly. I didn’t expect that reaction from them.

Or your reaction for that matter. But man, you started depositing trust into my account and into my heart every time you did that. I didn’t think anything of myself. So you were free to leave and I would have accepted it as par for the course. But no, you kept talking with me.

We went out into the foyer after they started locking up the main area. At least one other woman tried to approach you there. Again, you said you’d adjust them after you talked to me.

But then everybody started leaving the church. So we moved outside. Then everyone left the parking lot. Again – like the previous time when we talked after my rib moved back into place.

And we talked for hours that night. I wouldn’t have admitted it in my mind, but in my heart and spirit I for sure didn’t want the conversation to end. I felt good for the first time in a long time.

So unexpected. It didn’t make any sense. We were so different. Never in a million years would I have predicted it.

Was I just so lonely? Were you just being polite? Or was God doing something?