Woke up at 3am with an attack of the “shoulds”. Second-guessing decisions I’ve made that required a lot of courage. Remembered someone who is sane in Christ telling me, “Don’t ‘should’ all over yourself.” Remembered another friend saying if I can’t find direction in the Bible then I am free to choose.
Maybe we allow our enemy to keep us in bondage by accepting all that condemnation being rained down. Maybe God allows the battles so we can work through all the “shoulds” and get stronger in our true identity in Christ. And not have the “shoulds” available as a chain for others to jerk us around.
I am free to choose the job I want. I am free to choose where I want to live. I am free to choose who I want to marry.
I want to marry someone who wants me as much as I want them. I want to marry someone who is not ok with me not being in their life. I want someone who has good character and values. Who seeks God like I do. Etc.
That’s when the enemy says, “Who do you think you are? All full of yourself. Like anyone would ever want you like that.” And then the performance train rolls by and asks me to jump on. The “shoulds”.
But I’m not jumping on. I’m going to believe my God is big enough to match me up with someone who wants me as much as I want them. And I’ll work on being the best version of myself in the meantime. For me. Because I won’t be happy if I don’t like or respect myself.
Simple freedom. In Christ. Amen.