Sarah Nyhan

I think a god gave me some wisdom in regards to the swelling.  Too many preservatives mainly.  meat and salt secondarily.  I threw a big bag of food out.  Tired of being in this state.  I keep thinking of Jonathan.  But then I saw pictures of Taqui on Facebook last night.  He is really handsome.  But ignoring me.  So I am going to conclude he is not the right one for me for now.  I take that back.  I can’t help but wonder.  He is not perfect by any means.  But I wonder.  There is a thread of connection.  Just a thread.  Will be interesting to see how he reacts if I lose weight.  But he is such a flirt.  Could his eyes ever be for one lady?  I wonder how he was with his wife?  Maybe he is not the one for me.  I thought that also.  Just a help to get me away from Jonathan.  I don’t want to think of either of them.  They say you know when you know.  I don’t know with either of them.  Maybe god has someone else.  Who appreciates rap music and doesn’t want a girl who wears makeup.  Who is kind, positive, friendly, genuine, truthful, and enjoys communicating.  Someone who is very smart and not afraid of hard work.  Someone very smart with money.  Someone who just wants one woman and wants to be around his wife.  Who enjoys touch.  Who wants to have sex frequently, hopefully daily, and with passion.  Who we are both highly attracted to each other.  I want him to make the first move and subsequent moves.  To pursue me vs. me pursue him.  Who has a loving and accepting family that is not messed up was sexual perversion.  That is not turned off or turned on by my past.  I hope he has a great relationship with his dad and knows how to be a real man.  Other men respect him.  He isn’t always looking at women.  He is a one woman man.  Not at all attracted to men.  And of course, number one, seeks after god with his whole heart, mind, and soul.  Love’s god and loves all people.  Has a stronger relationship with god than I do.  Knows how to lead.  And is willing to lead but is not power hungry and not a control freak.  Someone who loves me and my body.  And I love him and his body.