Sarah Nyhan

I don’t have to heal other people.

I accuse other people of not trusting God. But as much as I believe, is there still a part of me that also doesn’t trust God’s heart for them?

Am I just impatient? Meddling by sharing my thoughts? Well-meaning as they might be.

I wonder. Will there come a time when God tells me to stop. To save my words. To completely let go. Not to try anymore.

When maybe I never had to. I hope my impatience hasn’t dragged this out longer than it had to. For my healing first. As the other(s) were always safe. There wasn’t any real problem except I didn’t trust them with God.

Wow. Worth considering.

It’s such a foreign concept to me. To finally find my voice after years of being told to shut up. Why then would God ask me to be silent? And go mind my own business.

Maybe more is caught than taught. Maybe the sweeter victory is not in converting someone so much as it is in inspiring them.

Maybe God doesn’t need me to do anything at all besides receiving Their Love. And then treating myself with kindness. Maybe God is really quite capable of handling the rest. Everything else.

Which would be the bigger gift? The one you insist on? Or the surprise?

What if I let go even more? In order to welcome and invite God to surprise me. In order to stop giving God instructions for how I want life to look. And instead trusting God’s heart for me. And asking for Their best. However that looks.

Do I really trust God that much? Do I really trust God’s Love for me like that? God’s Love for you?