Pawned me off.

I am posting a lot of my writings. They are in no particular order for now. Most of this is very old and from a long time ago.


She had an older boyfriend. And then her own car. And I was just tagging along. For the company. Even though most of it wasn’t my thing. Like I didn’t care about smoking cigarettes. But I’d go with her to the bowling alley where you could still buy them from a vending machine without getting carded.

And I think that’s where she introduced me to him. And I was immediately attracted. Although I certainly never would have made any outward indication of being so.

But here again somehow I got setup. I don’t even remember how it went down. Certainly no love story.

I remember it being so awkward when we first hung out. I think we both knew. But were trying to at least make the best of it.

But eventually I broke up with Josh. I knew he really wanted to be with my best friend. Not me.

The humiliation. Of my best friend pawning me off on some guy who really wanted her but will settle for me just so he can still be closer to her.

Even though I knew I’d be utterly alone, I still somehow had found the courage to not be desperate enough to stay with him.

But he sat in the row next to me in class. I had to see him every day. Ironically, I don’t remember those feelings ever bothering me even as much as they hurt.


Music I’m listening to, discovered, or rediscovered.

  1. Alok, ALOTT & Apophis – Alone
  2. Calvin Hill – Elevators
  3. Latto – Big Energy
  4. Mark Battles – Detox
  5. Mark Battles – Gift
  6. Rat City ft. Isak Heim – Rather Be (OKEY Remix)
  7. RÜFÜS DU SOL – Innerbloom (Radio Edit)
  8. Scorz ft. Diana Leah – Come To Life (Jody Wisternoff Remix)
  9. Scotty Sire – SUPER AVERAGE
  10. yetep ft. RUNN – One More Day

Other content I’ve consumed.

  1. 1,000 Deaf People Hear For The First Time
  2. Alcoholic interview – Victoria
  3. Making a baby fetus Green Pozole
  4. Southern Collard Greens w/Smoked Turkey Legs | Collard Greens Recipe
  5. Spiritual People THEN vs NOW
  6. Teaching my stepdaughter how to make homemade Alfredo
  7. THAT OLDER WOMAN YOU WORK WITH
  8. Theo Von review Gerry Vee’s videos on Jocko pod
  9. What I eat to be regular
  10. You need to make this perfect summer drink!! watermelon lemonade

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